Speaking of holistic, this would be a great way to describe the ideal mindset toward sex. That is, see the whole picture for what it is, which is more than the rote act of coitus (sex.) Having sex is about connecting with your partner emotionally, even spiritually, in addition to the physical aspect of sex. This means learning to pay attention to the needs of your partner as much, or even more so, than paying attention to your own. Think about the power of this would offer two  people that automatically do this for each other, without having to even discuss it. The needs of both would constantly be met, and even exceeded, automatically. This can have a profound effect on any relationship, not to mention longer lasting and more gratifying sex.

This also ties into the concept of whole-body intimacy. Sex does not just have to be about intercourse. It involves many different forms of contact with virtually all parts of the body. Caressing, massaging, including of the breasts and nipples, earlobes, feet, and the list goes on. Incorporating healthy foreplay and whole-body sensuality helps in many way to last longer during sex. Besides simply adding to the length of time involved in love-making, it offers a better chance for both partners to experience gratification, and increase mutual satisfaction from sex.

One of the most useful and effective techniques available for lasting longer during sex is called the “start and stop.” This simply means that you willfully choose to stop the stimulation once you feel yourself approaching orgasm. Once the urge to ejaculate subsides, begin lovemaking again. This technique not only post-pones ejaculation the minute you put it into practice, but over time, it trains the body to go longer periods of time before ejaculation.

Choosing to let your partner be on top is another very effective technique for lasting longer during sex. This gives her more control, while shortening the depth of penetration, which translates to less direct stimulation of the penis. This technique also requires less physical effort on your part, thus reducing the pressure on you to perform, as well as giving you the opportunity to relax. All of these factors contribute to your lasting longer during sex.

Last but not least, remember not to “be in a hurry” about lovemaking. Slow down, enjoy yourself, and don’t think about your orgasm. Make the experience more about pleasing your partner. Shifting your focus from yourself to your partner is a great way to improve your relationship beyond just lasting longer during sex.

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